Sure, Shane Battier might have retired after the 2013-14 season to become a broadcaster, but that doesn't mean he's stopped pursuing his true passion — hosting karaoke events to raise money for charity. Nor does it mean that his former Miami Heat teammates — or, notably in this case, his head coach — will stop getting their vocalization on for a good cause.
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Battier held his annual "Battioke" event on Tuesday night, an evening of South Beach song and dance in support of his Take Charge Foundation's work on "providing resources for the development and education of underserved youth and teens." Past editions have featured, um, interesting performances from the likes of Heat boss Pat Riley, Shai-loving All-Stars LeBron James and Dwyane Wade, and, of course, my Yahoo colleague Dr. Ken Jeong. This year, though, the star-making turn came from Heat head coach Erik Spoelstra, who donned a fedora, took the stage with girlfriend Nikki Sapp, and proceeded to prove that he didn't really remember very much of the Michael Jackson classic "Billie Jean."
Listen, we've all been there — you pick a song at karaoke thinking, "Man, I love that one," only to realize A) you're not totally sure how it goes and B) it is way longer than you remember it. Kudos to Coach Spo for refusing to let go of the rope, embracing the grind, staying the course and doing his level best to land the plane.
He may, however, need to adapt his process when it comes to non-marching-in-place-related dance moves:
While the Spoelstra-Sapp rendition of the M.J. hit left something to be desired, the performance of Vanessa Carlton's "A Thousand Miles" by recent Miami re-signee Michael Beasley — who joined with LeBron to slay Juvenile's "Back That Azz Up" at Battioke 2014 — and former Kansas State teammate/fellow 10-day addition Henry "Don't Call Me Bill" Walker — apparently gave the audience everything they never knew they wanted:
That solo earned Beasley recognition as the champion of Battioke 2015, topping Spoelstra, host Battier (who brought out ringer Jon Secada for a duet) and Riley (who performed "Twist and Shout" alongside a large number of women) among other competitors. Best of all for Super Cool Beas: he didn't even have to dress up like Sisqo to win the 'chip, as James Jones did last year. Way to stay true to your identity, Mike.
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Dan Devine is an editor for Ball Don't Lie on Yahoo Sports. Have a tip? Email him at devine@yahoo-inc.com or follow him on Twitter!
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